A quick poll of Twitter followers and Facebook friends finds that I'm far from the only person haunted by an indestructible My Space profile."I tried to do an art project like four or five years ago in which I ceremonially deleted my My Space Claire Evans, an artist and one half of the electronica duo YACHT, "but I couldn't complete it because I signed up for My Space with an old college address that was deleted when I graduated."As far as I can tell, this means our My Space profiles will exist until My Space finally dies.Which was supposed to be years ago, but then it got a last-minute defibrillator shock from Justin Timberlake and continues to stagger along with the sole purpose, it seems, of serving as an anthropological collection of the ways young people embarrassed themselves online in the early-to-mid-2000s.The PEZ is that unfortunate period that constantly floats about 5-10 years in the past, where your clothes and hairstyle are just stale enough to be comically outdated, but not old enough to be retro-cool. I call myself a "freelance word slut" on my profile.19-year-old Kevin Suwandee stopped using My Space about six years ago when he was in 7th grade, and his profile depicts the chubby hardcore online gamer he was at the time.Today he's in the army, lost a lot of weight and barely plays games."Since then, I've chosen a healthier lifestyle, my acne cleared up, I stopped using hair gel, and I also stopped wearing ' Southpole.' If you are lucky enough to still be able to sign into your old My Space profile and delete it, do it immediately. But if you are in the same situation as me and thousands of others, stuck with a permanent record of your existence in 2006: May God have mercy on your awkward soul.Update: I've been informed there is a way to delete your My Space profile even if you forgot your password and don't have your original email address.This happens again: Someone becomes suddenly notorious, and their old embarassing My Space profile soon surfaces in a seizure of flashing .gifs, the "last logged in" notifier usually displaying some date during George W. (Actually, a recent redesign of My Space seems to have eliminated the "last logged in" field to avoid showing what a ghost town it is.)put on Facebook.
SPIEGEL: So you never intended to create something bigger than just a local Web site for Los Angeles?
Which leads to the second reason the My Space profile problem is a unique threat to our online reputation.
My Space profiles were abandoned when Facebook started taking off, around 2005 or 2006, which freezes its portrait of you squarely in the Peak Embarrassment Zone (PEZ).
My Space's halcyon days were more innocent times for the internet, before everyone completely freaked out about hackers.
Back in the early 2000s passwords were, maybe, the name of your dog or a tree or a Moby album.